For my 'puritanical mother' who has apparently been having nightmares on behalf of my 'poor old battered liver', in this post I will talk less about how much beer I drink and instead answer some of her questions about what I'm doing.

Tell us about the language school.
Apollo is one of the better language schools in Hanoi; it has a good reputation, at least as a place to learn, and a really good resources library. Of three centres, mine is the one nearest the middle of town, so it's really easy to get places after work. There's free fruit in our office on weekends. There's aircon in the classrooms but not in the stairwells. I have a desk with my name on it.
How many teachers?
About 15/20...there always seems to be people coming and going, and I haven't met all of them yet. I think a few only work part-time. There are about 6 that I've made friends with.
What are they like and where are they from?
England, America, loads from Irelands, a Kiwi girl and her Argentinian boyfriend, some Germans...The ones I've spoken to I get on really well with. Some are a bit strange, some aren't very friendly. Also, loads of middle-aged men here have beautiful Vietnamese wives, so I guess they're here for different reasons than me, we don't really talk much.
How long do people tend to stay there?
Not very long...my school pays the worst in Hanoi, so loads of people leave or go part-time after a couple of months, so they can use the resources library but get better pay elsewhere. Apollo's shooting themselves in the foot though, because they're left with no experienced teachers, and no one who knows the school very well. They should pay us more.
What’s it like teaching?
I really enjoy it. I don't think I'm very good or very inspiring but I'm improving as I get more used to it. I like the little kids the best.
How do classes compare to the Italian kids?
The classes are bigger but m0re manageable. I think the kids are harder-working - obviously that's a generalisation and there are exceptions on both sides, but it does makes the classes easier to teach. Most of the kids are really cute. Some are brats, like when I gave my class sweets and let them draw a comic and this girl was like "Teachaaah, will do more interesting? Play a game? I not think this is interesting" and I was like "Fuck you bitch, comics are awesome"
Have you taught any adults?
Even the adult classes are mainly 16 year olds; I have probably taught one actual adult. I also gave a private lesson to my friend Tien but I don't think it was very good because he hasn't asked for another one.
How is your Vietnamese coming on?
Slowly but surely...I can speak enough to get around, ask for directions, get my motorbike fixed, order the food I want, but I can't have a conversation, and I apparently I can't avoid getting ripped off when I get my motorbike fixed.
How are you getting on with your bike?
I love my bike very much, I ride it everywhere. It is big and growly. On Friday I got a massive screw through my tyre in the middle of nowhere and a man came to fix it, but I think he did a bad job because at about 3am on Sunday morning it was flat again, and I had to abandon it, and pay extortionate amounts for a new tyre on Sunday evening. It was a bit crap but I think the adversity only brought my bike and me closer.
Are you still in one piece?
Yes

I think that was really boring but maybe only because I already know what's going on in my life. I hope you enjoyed it.

I was all set to pretend to be off sick today and run away into the mountains with my roommate Thoa, but woke up thinking of the reports I had to write and the body parts I had to teach, and decided to come into work. I blame my puritanical mother for giving me a good work ethic.

This song is awesome: